Love and Marriage
So, we get this question a lot, "When's the wedding?" Ryan and I have been together for over 5 years now, and they have been the most wonderful 5 years even with all the bad things happening in our lives. The fact that we take care of each other and support each other is something I don't always see in other couples today, even if they are married! We are a team and to be a good team, you really have to know and understand how the other person works and what you can do to make them a better person! People forget that! No, I don't mean change who they are by telling them to grow out a beard because you like it, even if they don't, but if they want to grow out a beard, let them! If she wants to dye her hair super crazy colors and chop her long hair off, let her!
I feel like the fact that Ryan and I aren't married yet is a fantastic thing! All too many times, people rush into saying I love you, moving in together, and then getting married. From the day that I sent out an e-mail to Ryan to try and make friends once I moved from Ohio to Kentucky, we took everything super slow. We were friends for months before melting into a relationship! We don't even know when the friendship turned into a relationship, it happened so naturally, and that is why the first day we first met face to face is our anniversary day. We started talking on Facebook and texting way back in February 2012 and we met August 21, 2012. From there, we just took things slow because I believe we both knew that being friends was not going to be enough for us. We did talk about how we both weren't ready to be in a relationship after we met because I was still looking for a job and needed to be on my own and learn to live without needing a man to take care of me. He had his personal reasons as well and we respected each other's reasons! We both were getting out of a rough relationship and really wanted to be on our own for a while and it was nice to have a friend who understood and someone who I could talk to about it and rely on for advice if I needed. Ryan was an amazing friend, the first one I made once I moved to Kentucky. Nowadays, people are looking for instant gratification when they meet someone they are attracted to. Yes, I was very attracted to Ryan when we started talking, but that was only a perk to our friendship, he was very easy on the eyes!
I would say that the point in which our friendship turned into a relationship was the time that Ryan and I were talking on the phone after I drove home from his house to let him know I was home safe and was I telling him how tired I was, he said that if I wanted to, next time I could spend the night. He said I could sleep in the bed and he would sleep on the couch if I wanted. When that day came, I didn't want to kick a man out of his own bed and since he had roommates, I decided I would sleep in the bed as well, as more of a test. He was a complete gentleman and we cuddled the whole night. It was quite amazing. He had passed! Even at that point, it still took a few months for our first kiss. We just enjoyed getting to know each other on a more personal level. We started talking about relationship topics and seeing if we even agreed on how relationships should be, and it's obvious that we did agree.
Back to the question, "When's the wedding?" To that we always answer with a shoulder shrug and a smile because we aren't in a rush to get married. We want to make sure that I am finished with school and that I have started my career. We want to get our credit scores as high as possible before saying, "I do." We want to have our home settled before the "I do's." We want to begin our marriage as perfectly as we can and without debt, which means saving up for the wedding so that we do not have to use credit. Besides, the longer it takes for us to get down the aisle, the more we learn about each other. We are still learning about each other and I love that!
So, my next blog will be some advice that I would give to couples, married or not, if they were to ask for advice. I feel like in my relationship, we have gone through so much and made it through with our relationship more strong than it was. Some things happened that would normally tear a couple apart, but we beat the odds. So, I feel with my experience in this amazing relationship, that I could share some awesome words of encouragement and enlightenment. As always, if you have any questions that you would like to ask, go to my homepage and leave a comment! If you want to remain anonymous, just use a screen name instead of your first name. I would love to address anyone's questions in my next blog! I also do intend on video blogging as well, so stay tuned for that!